This Is How Long Women Want Sex To Last

You know what? I’m going to come out and say it; I’m good at sex. At least I think I am? In most of my sex articles before this one, I’ve usually opened them with “Oooh I’m scared of women” or “I’m painfully average,” but I’ve just realised people read these (taken two and a half years to figure that out but hey ho) and I don’t want that kind of rep… anymore.

I’m not saying I’m fantastic but if this were the Premier League, I’d definitely be challenging for a place in the Champions League. Like last season’s Arsenal but more consistent, I’d say. Now, this isn’t because I’m some kind of sex master – I usually just stick to the set menu (missionary, cowgirl, doggy) – but because I’m too much of a narcissist to have people think lesser of me, I spend unprecedented amounts of time on foreplay. I hope my mum doesn’t read this…


But how long is too long… time-wise, I mean? Luckily GQ and Cosmohave been looking into it and we might just have some answers.

GQ were good enough to find a study from 2015 that found that the average sex… session(???) lasts only 5.4 minutes so if you’re exceeding that, presumably that means you’re doing a good job?

Apparently not, as Cosmo then found research that pointed to 7.5 minutes being the average time for getting laid. But then you have to bear in mind that both studies only including heterosexual sex and that the only part timed was the actual penetrative sex.


So no foreplay there.

Back in 2004 a study was published that did include the foreplay area, stating that people usually had eleven to 13 minutes of foreplay followed by seven to eight minutes of actual intercourse. As good as 18 to 21 minutes of bedroom fun sounds though, women still wanted more, with many claiming that twice as much time spent on the penetrative part would have been ace, as well as more foreplay.

Christ, they don’t want much, do they?


Just a quick question, does going down on one another count as sex? If, for example, you got laid last night – went down on each other and then had sex – and your friends started asking for all of the details for some weird reason, you’d say you had sex, wouldn’t you? You wouldn’t say “I got a blowjob and then sex”. But if you only got a blowjob that night, you wouldn’t tell people that you had sex. Where do you draw the line? Does sex start at penetration?

But I digress. How do you have longer sex?

Sex therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist Ian Kerner, PhD, author of She Comes First, says it’s all about foreplay.


I always encourage couples to engage in as much outercourse as possible before intercourse. The more outercourse you engage in, hopefully the higher your level of arousal and the closer you get to orgasm.”

So there you have it. Just so much head.

Too much head if anything… like getting a pint in a student union bar.

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